Flaws and All Page 6

  Angel’s mouth dropped. “Garrett proposed, and you kept this from us for three whole days?”

  “You didn’t even tell me. I’m your sister!” complained Reginell.

  Sullivan inspected Lawson’s hand. “Where is the ring? Or is the diamond too small to be seen with the naked eye?”

  “I can’t believe you didn’t say a word about it while we were out Saturday,” said Kina.

  “Ladies, please!” cut in Lawson. “I’ll fill you in on all the details later. Right now, there’s a more pressing matter at hand.”

  “What could be more pressing than you getting married?” asked Angel.

  Lawson took a deep breath. “Seeing Namon’s father today.”

  A hush fell over the room. Sullivan’s eyes nearly bulged out of their sockets. “You saw Mark? Are you sure it wasn’t just someone who looked like him?”

  Lawson nodded. “It was him. I’m positive.”

  “Did he track you down?” quizzed Kina. “Did someone tell him about Namon?”

  “No, I saw him at work. He teaches at North Central. Get this, not only does he teach at the school, but he’s also been assigned as my mentor.”

  “Girl, stop!” shrieked Sullivan.

  Angel winced. “Dang, small world, huh?”

  “Too small!” seconded Lawson. “I almost passed out when I saw him. It was completely surreal, like one of those out-of-body experiences. What am I going to do?”

  “You need to pray about this and ask God for direction,” suggested Kina. “The Bible says He’ll give you wisdom if you ask for it.”

  Reginell lowered her voice. “Does Garrett know?”

  “No. I called and asked him to come over when he gets off work. I plan on telling him everything then.”

  “Lawson, exactly what happened between you and this Mark person?” inquired Angel. “I didn’t meet you guys until Sully and I were roommates in college, and Mark was already out of the picture by then. I’m out of the loop here.”

  Sullivan bolted up. “I want to make it clear that it was not my fault! I just introduced them. They got into the baby-making business all on their own.”

  Lawson spoke up. “I was a virgin. Mark is the one who took it there, not me.”

  “You tagged along for the ride—literally and figuratively,” quipped Sullivan.

  “Okay, so what happened?” Angel asked again. “All I know is that Mark got you pregnant, moved to Virginia to play football, and that you never heard from him again. There’s got to be more to the story.”

  Lawson sighed. “That really about sums it up.”

  “No, it doesn’t,” cut in Sullivan. “Don’t you remember, Lawson? We were at Manny’s graduation party. I was gorgeous as usual, and you were . . . you.”

  Angel huffed. “Can we skip the Sullivan-is-fabulous parts and get to the point?”

  Sullivan cut her eyes at Angel. “Without that, there really isn’t much of a story.”

  Lawson closed her eyes and leaned back. “I can still hear K-Ci from Jodeci wailing, ‘So you’re havin’ my baby, and it means so much to me’ during Mark’s and my first dance at that basement party. That’s really where Namon’s conception began.”

  “You did it at the party?” asked Reginell.

  Lawson chuckled. “No, we did it at his house. Sully and I had just turned sixteen, school had dismissed for the summer, and we were ready to party. Sullivan always made it a practice to keep two boyfriends—one at our neighborhood school, and one from one of the swanky private schools across town.”

  Sullivan threw in, “Every teenage girl needs her good boy and her hood boy.”

  Angel deadpanned, “I’ll be sure to write that down.”

  Lawson continued. “Anyway, her private school boyfriend, Manny, had just graduated and was throwing a party at his house. Sullivan insisted on dragging me along with her, claim-ing that Manny had this cute friend that I just had to meet. Then she introduced me to the finest boy I’d ever laid eyes on.”

  “Sullivan has nothing if not good taste in men,” admitted Reginell.

  “His name was Mark, and he’d just graduated too. We settled into a corner of the room to talk. He told me about his full athletic scholarship to Virginia Tech and his plans to leave in two weeks for football camp, and I told him all about me. When Jodeci came on, he asked me to dance.”

  “Bump and grind is more like it,” amended Sullivan.

  Lawson remembered how Mark cupped her body close to his as they swayed to the music. By the time Jodeci reached the bridge of “Forever My Lady,” she was convinced that she was in love. “A little later,” narrated Lawson, “Sully busted in on us in a frenzy because her other boyfriend, Anwar, was on his way over. Mark didn’t want me to leave, so he offered to take me home so Sullivan could escape.”

  “See, if you had left with me, none of this would be happening,” Sullivan crowed.

  “Will you stop butting in? I want to hear the story,” said Reginell. “Now, go on.”

  “Well, after a few more songs, Mark was ready to go. It was still early and his parents were out for the night, so he invited me over to talk and watch music videos.”

  Angel looked on in disbelief. “And you believed that was all he wanted to do?”

  “I was sixteen and naïve,” admitted Lawson.

  Sullivan murmured, “Try stupid and gullible.”

  “Things started out innocently enough. At first, we really did just watch TV. Then he put his arm around me. An arm on the shoulder led to a hand on the thigh, which led to a kiss, which led to his other hand sliding underneath my shirt, which led to us conceiving Namon on the couch in his rec room.

  “After that, Mark and I exchanged numbers, but neither of us called the other. The party was the first and last time we saw each other until today. I tried reaching out to him once I realized I was pregnant, but he’d already left for college by then. Manny cut Sullivan off after he found out about Anwar, and he was my only real connection to Mark.”

  Angel was enthralled by the story. “What did your mom say?”

  “She wanted to know who the punk was that knocked up her sixteen-year-old daughter! I didn’t tell her, though, until Namon was around six or seven. By then, I was well into my twenties and involved with Garrett. I resolved a long time ago to raise Namon the best I could without his father, and that’s what I did.”

  “Do you regret not trying harder to find Mark?” asked Angel.

  “I do now!” retorted Lawson. “I wouldn’t change anything, though. Namon has been the joy of my life. Who knows what would have happened if Mark had known about him? His parents had money. They probably would’ve tried to take him away from me or made us bounce Namon back and forth between the two of us. I have to believe that things turned out the way they were meant to.”

  “Well, now that Mark is back on the scene, I think you need to tell him,” said Kina. “He has a right to know that he has a child out there.”

  “No, he doesn’t!” disputed Sullivan. “Lawson doesn’t know anything about this guy. He could be crazy or God knows what else. Why would she expose her son to him?”

  Angel agreed. “Sully’s got a point, and who’s to say he won’t go after custody?”

  Lawson grimaced. “You think Mark would do that?”

  “Would you blame him?” asked Reginell. “If it were me, I’d do everything in my power to get my kid back.”

  “Me too,” admitted Kina.

  Lawson panicked. “I hadn’t considered that. If this thing winds up in court, any lawyer could argue that Mark is the victim here. What if I’m forced to hand over my son? I can’t risk that. Losing Namon would kill me.”

  “Yeah, but think about what Namon is missing out on,” countered Reginell. “All he knows about Mark is that he took off before Namon was born, and nobody has heard from Mark from that day to this one. Whether or not Namon admits it, you know he’s curious about his real dad. Do you really want to deprive him of knowing the truth?”


  Angel interposed. “You must think about Garrett in all of this, too, Lawson. He’s been Namon’s dad since Namon was three years old. Where does this leave him?”

  “Bringing Mark into the picture would be a slap in the face to Garrett,” said Sullivan. “After everything Garrett’s done for both of you, he deserves better than that.”

  “He deserves better than what?” asked Garrett as he rushed into the living room. “It looks like you all are having a major estrogen session going on in here.” To ease the tension, they all made a halfhearted attempt to laugh at his joke.

  “Garrett, I think you need to sit down. We have to talk,” said Lawson.

  “Baby, if this is about Saturday night, it’s cool. You were right. We don’t need to rush into anything. We love each other, and you, me, and Namon are a family. That’s all that matters.” The women exchanged ominous glances that Garrett picked up on immediately. “You’re acting strange. What’s going on here?”

  Angel was the first to rise. “I think we better get out of here so they can talk.”

  Reginell followed suit. “Yeah. See you later, sis.”

  Sullivan leaned down and gave Lawson a quick hug. “Call me when you get everything figured out.”

  Kina squeezed Lawson’s hand. “Think about what I said. He has a right to know.” They all filed out quietly, leaving Lawson alone with Garrett.

  Garrett took a seat next to Lawson. “Okay, what’s wrong? This seems serious.”

  “It is,” she confessed. “I ran into Mark today.”

  “Mark who?”

  “Mark Vinson.” She paused. “Namon’s biological father.”

  “Are you serious?”

  Lawson nodded.

  Garrett slumped down into the sofa, blown away. “Was it just a coincidence, or has he been looking for you?”

  “Coincidence. He works at North Central.”

  “Did he say anything to you?”

  “We spoke for a minute, but I don’t think he had any idea who I was.”

  “How do you feel about that?”

  She sighed. “I’m relieved. The less he remembers about that night, the better.”

  “Why? I mean, you are gonna tell him about Namon, aren’t you?”

  “I wasn’t planning on it, not unless it becomes absolutely necessary.”

  “Lawson, the man is Namon’s father.”

  “So what? What contribution has Mark made to Namon’s life that I couldn’t have gotten from the local sperm bank?”

  “That doesn’t matter. He still has a right to know—they both do.”

  “Who cares about Mark’s rights?”

  “A judge might, for one.”

  “What about my rights? I’ve been raising Namon by myself since I was in high school. Don’t I have the right to protect him and make sure he’s well adjusted? Don’t I have the right to decide who should and shouldn’t be a part of his life? It’s not only my right, Garrett; it’s my duty as his mother.”

  “It’s Mark’s duty, too, as his father.”

  Lawson jumped up, her temper flaring. “Just whose side are you on?”

  Garrett held her. “Yours. You don’t even have to ask me that.”

  “Then act like it,” she replied coldly. “You said that you wanted to adopt Namon. Do you honestly think that Mark would just sign him over to you if he knew the truth?”

  “I don’t know what he might do, but we both know there has to be a public notice put in the paper about the adoption petition. He’s bound to find out sooner or later.”

  “Well, I’m praying for later.”

  “It’s already been thirteen years. How much more time do you need?”

  “As long as it takes to protect my child. Who knows how Mark will react once he finds out we have a teenage son together?”

  “Keeping quiet would be fine if Mark was off somewhere never to be seen or heard from again, but he’s here, Lawson. You don’t have much of a choice.”

  Lawson paced the floor as she contemplated her next move. “There’s another alternative to telling Mark about Namon, and it might be the only way out of this.” She entwined her hands with his. “We can leave.”

  Garrett exhaled. “Leave? Lawson, you can’t be serious.”

  “I am!” she affirmed. She squeezed his hands and stated emphatically, “Baby, let’s do it! Let’s get married, take Namon, and get as far away from here as we can.”

  “And leave your home, this new job, your church, and your friends? You know you don’t want to do that, and I know that you’re not a quitter. You’re not somebody who runs from your problems, you deal with them.”

  “This is how I intend to deal with this one.”

  Garrett cupped her face in his hands. “Lawson, I love you. There’s nothing I want more than for you to be my wife, but I can’t marry you like this, or let you duck out like a coward.”

  “But, Garrett—”

  “I said no,” he stated firmly. “Running might be a quick fix, but that’s not going to stop Namon from wondering about his biological father. You can’t just hide this from him. You’ve got to face this situation eventually.”

  Lawson snapped her fingers. “So, just like that, you want me to hand over my son to a virtual stranger?”

  “I’m not suggesting anything that radical. I just don’t want you to do something that’s only going to make things worse. We need to seek God on the matter and follow His lead. Obedience is better than sacrifice. He’s not going to allow this man to take your son away from you. Have faith.”

  Lawson dropped her head into her hands and gave in. “You’re right. What was I thinking?”

  He wrapped his arms around her. “You weren’t thinking, you were panicking. We’ll figure this thing out, though.”

  Lawson lifted her eyes to meet his. “We?”

  “Yeah. We’re a team, right?”

  Lawson managed a faint smile. “Right.”

  Garrett sat down, and Lawson swathed herself in his embrace. “So, when are you going to break the news to him?” he asked her.

  “Are you talking about Mark or Namon?”

  “I guess both.”

  “I don’t know. Once the truth gets out, there is no turning back. That’s what scares me,” she admitted.

  “Don’t be scared. I’m behind you all the way, no matter what you decide. Namon is your son, so do what you think is best. Just remember, baby, no secret stays one for very long. Everything done in the dark eventually comes to light.”

  Chapter 10

  “What kind of man just wakes up one day and decides to turn his back on his family?”

  —Angel King

  “So, what do you think about this Lawson situation?” asked Angel as she and Kina shopped for groceries on Kina’s “approved foods” list after leaving Lawson’s house.

  Kina sighed. “That’s a tough one. I know Lawson is just trying to look out for her son, but I don’t think keeping him from his father is the best way to do it. Parents try so hard to protect their children, but sometimes nothing you do is ever enough.”

  “Are we still talking about Lawson here?”

  Kina stopped. “No, I’m worried about Kenny,” she confided. “He’s been saying things I don’t think a kid his age ought to be thinking about, much less be putting into words.”

  “What did he say?”

  “He said he would kill E’Bell if he ever did anything to me. It kind of scared me to hear him talk like that.”

  Angel’s eyes widened. “Kill him, as in murder?”

  “Yeah.”

  Angel blew out a breath. “That’s serious, Kina. What did you tell him?”

  “I talked to him and told him that he shouldn’t say things like that, but I don’t know . . . something in his eyes made me nervous.”

  “What has E’Bell done that would make Kenny think he needed to protect you?” Angel had long suspected that E’Bell was abusive, but could never get Kina to admit it.

  “Kenny he
ard us arguing the other night, and you know how kids are. He read more into it than there was. I mean, I know that E’Bell’s not perfect,” acknowledged Kina, “but he’s given up a lot for us. Who knows where football would’ve taken him if he hadn’t let it go to be with Kenny and me?”

  “You’ve made a lot of sacrifices, too, you know,” Angel pointed out, discarding the carton of chocolate chip cookies Kina had sneaked into the cart. “You had plans of your own. Not many eighteen-year-olds would be willing to give up their dreams to become the wife and baby’s mama of some washed-up football player.”

  “E’Bell’s not washed up, Angel. He’s just in a bad place right now. Think about it. He was the one everybody had pegged to go pro, now, he’s a janitor at the same high school where he was the star athlete. I can’t blame him for being bitter about it.”

  “You never asked him to give up his career, or to drop out of school, or to become a janitor. Even if you did, it was his choice to do so, and he has no right to take out his shortcomings on you and Kenny.”

  Kina stopped pushing the cart. “Look at me. Do you see the cute size three cheerleader I was in high school? In case you hadn’t noticed, my twenty-four-inch hourglass waistline has been replaced by this forty-one-inch muffin.” She looked down at her torso. “This is not the body E’Bell fell in love with fifteen years ago.”

  “He’s not exactly the Give-’em-hell E’Bell the newspapers used to call him either. The only six pack he can brag about now is the one in the fridge, but you accept him anyway. Why can’t he do the same for you?”

  “It’s just different for men, especially for a man like him.”

  “E’Bell has no right to make you feel bad about yourself. No one does. And for the record, Kina, you’re still a very beautiful woman.”

  Kina laughed. “On what planet? I looked through my yearbook the other day and just cried. I don’t know what happened to me, my body, or to all that long hair I had.”

  “Well, your hair wouldn’t keep falling out if you stopped stressing so much,” Angel theorized. “All that stuff changes with time anyway. Besides, I like your hair short, and who hasn’t put on a few pounds? I want you to focus on just being healthy, mentally and physically. We’re supposed to be setting a good example for our clients.”